One of the highlight reel life of our time is the concept of self love. Granted that self love entails accepting your flaws and perfections, the edges and the rounds, the highs and the lows, in poverty and riches, in your health and sickness. (It’s beginning to sound like wedding vows).
Normally woke terms are often transient in their nature, but I feel like self-love is one bad ass concept that is pungent. It is here to stay. And we must welcome our stayee guest by talking about her (don’t judge).
There’s a thin line between self love and self absorption/self centredness/ narcissism/el narcisismo and as it turns out, not only has that line been wrecked but has also been crossed. I hereby deputize myself to rant about it not because am a consummate genius at it but because I have kinda struggled with it. And when I say kinda I mean like aloooot. It’s in a moment of insidious despair, I realized that I wasn’t that terrible at it, my onlookers were faulty with the expectation.
The measure of best loving your self has often been trapped under the narrative of unhealthily overestimating your own self-importance. Telling your story in a way that puts a halo in your every action while completely downplaying everyone else’s IQ, job, character, ideologies, and choices.
Personal values and personal preferences shouldn’t be the marking scheme we use to judge other people values and preferences. If being verbal about your problems is your form of self-love don’t force it down everybody’s throats, some people like to meditate when in distress. Also, there is no need to have imploding rage for days when you encounter people who don’t express love like you do.
Here’s a heretical thought: Your version of self love is someone else’s version of self poisoning. Let me paint a clearer picture, if treating yourself to cold glasses of beer, or eating pizza is your version of self love, someone else could argue that in a few years your “self love” will bring about health implications.
I harmonize with the idea of believing in your uniqueness and in yourself. Am fascinated by beings who look within themselves because that’s where the treasure is. However, finding your greatness doesn’t authorize anyone to belittle the potential of others.
The nails that bound the bed of self-love include self-respect. (P.S respect is earned not demanded). Actual competency in handling our emotions, being accountable for our thoughts and actions, understanding other people, and maxing out our potential.
Self love is not self centredness. Kujipenda sio kujiona.
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